In the first week of December 2020, my family was on a spring cleaning routine. Going over what’s still being used in the house and what’s not, figuring out the ever-evolving sorting cycle of keep, donate, recycle or discard. A couple of hours into the exercise, we opened THE shelf, the one I was hesitating to approach.
Tucked away and thrown in, were several items that time and technology had made obsolete. Things that had been replaced by more new, modern, fancy, user-friendly objects. If you are from my generation, you could perhaps relate to what it means to have a large bag full of cassette tapes which have been almost unused for the last ten years. Though we don't use these things anymore, they bring up plenty of nostalgia and good fond memories.
Every time that shelf is opened for spring cleaning, it gets partly retained and partly cleaned out. It has always been a difficult decision on what to keep and what to throw. This year, however, as a family, we took a bold step to make room for the new - to intentionally create more open, free space and clear out the clutter from the house.
Christmas songs were playing in the background, and the beautiful voice of Francesca Battistelli singing Mary’s song written by Nichole Nordeman filled the room and like a sweet aroma reached my heart and senses -
“I am not brave, I’ll never be,
The only thing my heart can offer is a vacancy
I’m just a girl, nothing more, I am willing, I am Yours
Be born in me, be born in me,
Make my heart your Bethlehem
Be born in me,”
Mary's hymn expresses praise to God for His treatment of her and extends her praise to how God has treated the righteous throughout the ages. Understanding what God is doing through her, Mary’s heart possesses a mood of joy.
I wonder if our hearts could be laid out in three dimension with all that lies inside, and be evaluated through a sorting cycle - keep, donate, recycle or discard! A little corner of my heart has lived frozen in time over many years, scarred by the pain of a lost relationship. With passing time, life has gone on quite well albeit with a frozen corner unwilling to be dealt with.
As Christmas in a coronavirus-dominated year approached and as we were staring at many closed churches, empty pews, socially distanced, quieter celebrations, it was time to reflect if there was room for Jesus to be born in me. There was plenty of cleaning up to do and particularly to be willing to bury the decaying dead corpses of the past. A willingness to make my heart His Bethlehem, to prepare a clean, beautiful room for a baby to be born, to replace the stinking corpses of unforgiveness, pain and misery with the laughter and joy of a new birth. A willingness to replace the old with the new, the mortal with the eternal, the earthly known with the heavenly unknown.
It has been tough to let go when there are many questions still unanswered and my mind is unclear or unable to fathom them. It isn’t simple when life’s happenings just do not make sense and you end up with the stinging loss of life, love, people and relationships.
As Mary so profoundly prayed in Luke 1:48: “For He has regarded the lowly state of His maidservant; For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed.” We have all been blessed by Jesus coming to earth and humbling Himself to be born as a baby and die for our sins. We can all pray this gorgeous song directly to Him and ask Him to “make my heart Your Bethlehem, be born in me.” That’s what Christmas is all about.
This season, I pray Mary’s prayer of surrender, her prayer of despair, of a terrified, unclear mind wrapped in a believing, tender heart. I pray for strength to move on, to clean up my heart, to cry and mourn over the corpses of the past and prepare room for Christ to take control, to heal, to deliver and simply be born in me!
Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash
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thanks for this much needed reminder..
"I pray Mary’s prayer of surrender, her prayer of despair, of a terrified, unclear mind wrapped in a believing, tender heart"
Amen..
Hello Vaniz,
I appreciate how you took a simple context and delivered it in a strong way.
Love it ! Happy new year .
Selvina